Since 1977, over 10,000 Spokespersons Trained.

Some Podium Humor

While these jokes are all "corny," they have all been used to tickle funny bones over many years.

  1. Maid being interviewed for new job:
    "Can you serve company?"
    "Yes, Ma'am, both ways."
    "What do you mean?" asked the lady.
    "So they'll come again or so they won't."
  2. Two young boys walked into the dentist's office. One faced the dentist boldly and said, "Doc, I want a tooth pulled out and I don't want no gas 'cause I'm in a hurry."
    "I must say, you're a brave boy," said the dentist. "Which tooth is it?"
    The little boy turned to his silent friend and said, "Show him your tooth, Joey."

  3. Several women at a party were chatting with the little daughter of their hostess.
    "I suppose that you are a great help to your mother," commented one of them.
    "Oh, yes, Ma'am" replied the child "and so is Sally, but today it's my turn to count the spoons after you have gone."

  4. "A friend of mine is a stockbroker. That's a fascinating business to be in. It's surprising how many people drive to his office in a Mercedes to get financial advice from people who came to work in a bus."

  5. "I'll say one thing for _________ (club member or ?). He knows what poverty means. He looked it up in Webster's."

  6. "I didn't say it was a tough course. I just said it's the first time I ever saw a sand trap with headstones."

  7. "I get very discouraged trying to get our kids to take baths. It's tough on a parent knowing that his car meets EPA emission standards and his 10-year old son doesn't."

  8. "Confidence is critical. Confidence is going after Moby Dick with a rowboat, a harpoon, and a jar of tartar sauce."

  9. "I'm told you can always tell if a speaker is lying by looking into his eyes."
    (Put on a pair of sunglasses)
    "And so, I'll begin the financial report "